Bringing me Down

I was pretty sure I could only die once, that my life could end only on the night that I ended the lives of two people in a way that even those in my new existance wouldn't tolerate...

I couldn't have been more wrong. Dad found me, and the people I've wanted to trust me and I've done so much to prove myself to saw what kind of monster I am. Even he might know.

Alex, David... It takes too much effort to go out and face them right now...

I knew I'd screwed up and make msitakes. I should have stayed in Mira Mesa, kept in seclusion and treated how I was... It'd be better than this. I know exactly how they found me, but I didn't know about how much evidence they really had. How could I have not known... Photos, Sure, but... Motherfucking Godforsaken Video Tapes? Since when is SDSU London? There's no way they gave me the only tape, Either... The thought of a first Change on tape must be too valuable for them not to.

For Fuck's Sake, Faith in Technology comes with a price... There must be some way I can keep the thing I love from fucking me everywhere I go. So many places with tapes, so many places with my face... How am I supposed to deal with people if every mistake I made is recorded on magnetic media someplace, waiting to bite me in the ass?

Maybe the spirits can offer some advice... And maybe I can go deal with them before that son of a bitch Niela shows up. How dare she possibly complain about anything in her life, She doesn't have the fundamental fuck-up that all of us began our new lives with to haunt her, nothing to atone for.. I don't care what that sleazy shadowlord bastard does with her if it keeps her the hell away from me. Bloodless change... I hope she dies in a fucking fire.

Maybe I should leave and go back. At least with the walkers, someone can fix these things when I screw them up... No one here understands as well...

[Scared and Pissed]
-Daniel